default cover
  • Type Tarot Reader / Fetish Performer / Chaos Goblin For Hire
  • Location The Realm Of Wonders, United Kingdom

Tarot-reading tarty TV with a heart of gold and a pretty funny if sometimes potty f***ing mouth.

If you want your cards read, trust me, I'm playing with a full deck (not that everyone believes that). And any answers you get will be practical, caring, and usually insightful, but honest.

Please contact me for a reading: donations can be made here, or I may accept donations to charity. Or if you'd prefer to see me in something you want: my sizes are 40E-34-40 (though I can squeeze into 38E), shoes UK9 / EU43 / US11.

If you want anything more... intimate, I'm available for kinky co-creations and session play for Dommes, both as sub and switch/evil sidekick. Fully and happily bi, but can get picky about boys. (Honestly, you don't know where they've been half the time. At least with a strapon you can throw it through the dishwasher: boys tend to object. Not sure why.)

Other interests: old-school gaming, guitar (badly/relearning), comedy writing (especially comebacks: I have a well-trained gag reflex.)

Tarot-reading tarty TV with a heart of gold and a pretty funny if sometimes potty f***ing mouth.

If you want your cards read, trust me, I'm playing with a full deck (not that everyone believes that). And any answers you get will be practical, caring, and usually insightful, but honest.

Please contact me for a reading: donations can be made here, or I may accept donations to charity. Or if you'd prefer to see me in something you want: my sizes are 40E-34-40 (though I can squeeze into 38E), shoes UK9 / EU43 / US11.

If you want anything more... intimate, I'm available for kinky co-creations and session play for Dommes, both as sub and switch/evil sidekick. Fully and happily bi, but can get picky about boys. (Honestly, you don't know where they've been half the time. At least with a strapon you can throw it through the dishwasher: boys tend to object. Not sure why.)

Other interests: old-school gaming, guitar (badly/relearning), comedy writing (especially comebacks: I have a well-trained gag reflex.)

View more

Timeline

EmilySwitchblade avatar

Daily Tarot 21st October 2026: Page Of Cups & High Priestess

If you're in tune with the High Priestess's ideas on intuition, you'll be open to messages and offers from the Universe.
But just so you

... Read more
EmilySwitchblade avatar

Say hello to the new girls...

*boing* *boing* *boing* ... so much fun. And weighty: pure silicone inside and out. But they're gonna be my friends. Maybe yours too.

... Read more
00:16